Starring: Katherine Heigl, Ashton Kutcher, Tom Selleck, Catherine O’Hara, Kathryn Winnick, and Kevin Sussman
Genre: Action / Adventure, Romantic Comedy
Rated: PG-13
Jen (Heigl), recently single, is on vacation in Nice, France with her parents when she meets handsome Spencer (Kutcher) in the elevator. The two swiftly strike up a romance and marry. Three years later, the two are on the run from a seemingly never-ending number of assassins intent on ending Spencer’s life.
The exact timeline of Jen and Spencer’s premarital relationship is fairly vague. The vacation apparently lasted three weeks, though we only see them together in France twice. Then suddenly he’s home with Jen and her family telling her father he wants to marry her. I also wondered if he just decided to move across the Atlantic to live with her when her vacation ended, or if they had carried on a long distance relationship before he dropped everything and moved to the United States to be with her. I was thinking, “Wow, everything is happening so quickly…” We never see the wedding, and then the plot skips ahead three years (thankfully it lets the audience know this with lower third text) to the happily married couple preparing to celebrate Spencer’s birthday. The relationship felt very rushed to me, and I could not find it believable.
I really thought the writing could have been a lot better than it was. The story was not well-thought out. The person who sent the assassins was pretty predictable, especially since they pretty much tell the audience who it is maybe fifteen minutes before the climax. The characters were fairly stupid in places, and some felt entirely useless. For example – Jen’s mother was nothing but a comedic device, redundantly shown drinking lots of alcohol (multiple glasses of wine, Bloody Marys with the pitcher as a glass, etc.) It made me wonder how Jen could possibly have the “amazing relationship” with her mother that the film claimed she had when her mother was clearly an alcoholic. The ending leaves the biggest question of all: how do you explain away all the dead bodies?
The acting left something to be desired. I never considered Kutcher as an action star, and after this I don’t think he should pursue another job within the genre. He was fairly wooden and hard to believe as a spy. Heigl really didn’t seem to care for her character at all – she’s played in so many romantic comedies, this is old hat for her, and she really didn’t seem to put forth the effort. Both she and Kutcher are talented comedic actors but it really felt like neither one was invested in this project whole-heartedly. Also, the two didn’t have any chemistry together – and that alone can make or break a film. Selleck and his trademark mustache had the best acting as Jen’s overprotective, seemingly paranoid father. As stated above, O’Hara (most notably known for her role as the mother in the first two Home Alone films) was underutilized as her character was little more than a lush.
After all that running around, being shot at, crashing cars, physically fighting with other people, the clothing and actors look pristine. There are no rips, stains, stray threads or lint on these clothes and not a scratch on either of our title characters – highly unlikely. Also, did they really expect us to believe that a woman on the run from assassins would remain in high heels the entire time? Especially when the two stopped off at a K-mart and she could have easily grabbed a pair of cheap flip flops at the very least. At that point, I doubt she was thinking how dorky comfortable shoes would look with her outfit, and probably would have thought that it would not be logical to remain wearing shoes that high. If they didn’t want her to buy shoes, at least have her kick off the heels and run barefoot. So ridiculous.
There are a few things I did like about the movie, however. The scenery in the beginning of the film was beautiful. The fight scene between Kutcher and Kathryn Winnick (“Hannah” from Season 6 of Bones) was fun and it was nice to see her kicking some butt. I also liked the fact that the film seems to be pushing the message that you should always be yourself in a relationship – if you’re meant to be with that person, they will love you for who you are, past actions included. They also push the message that honesty is key. It’s just too bad the film was so poorly written and acted.
Overall: This could have been a fun film, but it was dragged down by a script that wasn’t thought out well and actors that really didn’t seem to care. There are some positive elements that keep it from getting a much lower rating, but overall, I was not impressed.
5/10
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