Meatcleaver Massacre (1977)

AKA: "Hollywood Meatcleaver Massacre" and "Morak"

Directed by: Evan Lee

Starring: Christopher Lee, Larry Justin, J. Arthur Craig, James Habif, Robert Clark, Bob Mead, and Doug Senior

Rated: R

Genre: Horror, Slasher, Supernatural

There has been an attack on the Cantrell home. Home invaders have severely injured Professor Cantrell and murdered the rest of his family. Now, the professor and acclaimed occult researcher lies unconscious in a hospital bed, his soul summoning an ancient demon, Morak the Avenger, to bring justice down upon the perpetrators. He knows who they are, and they will pay with their lives.

The title of this film is very misleading. There are no deaths related to a meat cleaver. In fact, there aren’t really any interesting deaths at all. There is no gore to speak of, and the violence happens so quickly, the viewer isn’t even sure what is happening. When we are dealing with characters as despicable as the guys in this film, the deaths should be long, drawn out, creative, and gory, not blink-and-you-miss-it or leaving you wondering what just happened.

The editing is very choppy, jumping around sporadically throughout a scene, and often splicing two different scenes together, confusing the viewer. For example: we see Dirk slam against a mirror, bleeding (orangey colored blood!), then we see him sitting in a chair lost in thought, then we’re back to him and the bloody mirror, then the chair again. Then there’s the whole scene where Dirk is contemplating suicide, about to slit his wrist, then realizes he’s late for work, so he decides against it. Really? Couldn’t we have left that ridiculous scene out? Did it do anything for the story?

The lighting in the film is terrible. There are many scenes, especially when a death is about to occur, and the entire climax, where it is hard to see anything at all. It was difficult to discern what actually happened in the final moments of the climax, I’m still not entirely sure about the events that unfolded.

It is really hard to get into a film when you don’t like the characters. The only decent one is the Professor, everyone else is either annoying, disgusting or boring. I can’t feel scared for characters I do not care about. I felt the home invasion could have been a very suspenseful, intense scene, but the film plows on through it, leaving the viewer thinking, “Well, that happened.” Those were characters the audience could have gotten behind and rooted for, but instead we don’t even know their names. Meanwhile, the audience is subjected to the annoying repartee of Sean, Dirk, Phil and Mason, the morons behind the Cantrell murders – and don’t even get the satisfaction of seeing them die brutally.

The only thing this film has going for it is the appearance of horror legend, Christopher Lee, bookending the crappy schlock. Lee discusses interesting supernatural occurrences that slightly relate to what the professor was teaching in class. These anecdotes are more interesting than anything else the flick has to offer. I’m not sure why such a legend would appear in such bland dreck, but even he could not save it.

Overall, this is a boring supernatural slasher with unlikable characters and terrible lighting and editing. It’s not worth your time.

3/10